I was able to hear a beautiful testimony of the power of prayer and it got me to thinking of how God has been such a huge part of my life within the past year. I don't want to fail and say he wasn't there before - he was. I wasn't. I was selfish and so self absorbed I didn't know how to allow God to get glory. It was not a moment in my life story I am proud of. Yet, here I am and can look back on those days and give him all the thanks he deserves.
The testimony I heard was from a friend who is due before Tim and I. She was told her little boy was breech and if he did not turn she would have to have a C-section. She wrote of how she started with the question why me. Then with prayer and Gods grace she was given peace about the situation. IF she were to have a C-section it was God's will. The great moment where God intervenes. Her little boy is head down and she will be able to labor the way she wanted to. God is truly amazing.
Because of this testimony I think on my own pregnancy. On the moments where I thought why me? Then I thought on all the things where he has stepped in and guided me. I am beyond thankful for those moments.
As we near the arrival of Eddison I can't help but think about how I have one HUGE decision to make. Will we have her at OU or will we have her at home.
There are so many things I feel, heard, think, etc. That guide me in what I think is best for our baby. Then there is my husband. Does he want the same thing? If yes or no, why? I feel once we get to talking about it he turns his listening off. I don't want him to feel like he is being pressured into something he doesn't want to do.
Please pray for us.
Tuesday, July 16, 2013
The Slap
You know those moments that you think - yep, nothing will happen from this. Then it slaps you in the face and you are wide eyed and so thankful you took part in the moment...well I had one of those moments this weekend.
There are a lot of things on my mind about this pregnancy and I was honestly becoming discouraged by the fact I have no definite answer. Do we ever have a definite answer? So, I thought if anyone can give me the answer it is God.
Well - Saturday night rolls around and I feel awful. Tired beyond belief, up every hour, can't get comfortable, heartburn, and just plain miserable. I woke up Sunday morning thinking forget it. I am not going to church. I wont get the answer I am longing for anyway. I won't get anything from service, and it was raining. I will stay home and rest.
Then a little nudge. I got dressed. Then Tim asks if I am going to church. Ironic. He knew nothing of my wanting to skip out. This is odd because he never asks me if I am going. So, I think okay sure I will go. By this time it is already 10am and I figure forget it. We will be late and I don't want to go.
Another nudge.
My friend Jordan sends me a text asking, "You going to be at church?" SLAP! Okay God you have my attention. I will be there. Late, tired, and all.
The moment I walk into the church I am overcome with happiness. Tired still, but happy. Once we sit down I think.. wow small crowd. Then I turn and see Braiden Fisher. I instantly become filled with joy at seeing him there. Then the church fills up. Brother after Brother stand. Testimonies, prayers, songs, prophecies, preachings.... every one seemed to hit home with me. I kept telling myself stay in your seat.
Then finally I decided to stand. I wanted to stand and say how Satan had almost won with me. I almost didn't come. Had it not been for the question and the text this morning. I would not have stood had it not been for two brethren standing to their feet to testify. I would not have stood but I did not want to fall short. I stood and shared how afraid I was that my daughter would not have the faith to fall back on, that I had been tormented following my baptism by Satan. I stood and shared everything I had felt that morning. Upon sitting I thought that sure was pointless.
Then Braiden began to sing. Wow... and then a sister stood to her feet to testify that all she wanted was to hear him sing. Then Braiden stood to say how he felt the spirit the moment he walked in to sing, but was fearful. Yet, had it not been for my standing to my feet he would not have done. That he was so thankful he did because that sister was in need and was able to have her prayer fulfilled.
I was overcome with joy.
Then here comes Sis. Odessa. She came and prayed for me. As soon as she got on her knee I was in tears. Her prayer was beautiful and filled with everything I had asked. The biggest thing I took from it was she prayed God would fill me with the type of faith my grandfather Jack had. I may not have known him, but wow his legacy holds strong. She then prayed God would guide us in the pregnancy and that my companion would be filled with faith during this time and would see by my example what the faith can do.
Again, I was overcome with joy.
So - although Satan may have almost won. God most certainly was triumphant in this battle. My heart and soul have been filled with peace, calm, and happiness since that morning. It has not ceased to thank him for the things he allowed me to see, hear, and witness.
My thought. If God puts it in your heart, even just a small grain, we should follow through. We should stand tall on what he has given us. We should grasp the moment and be patient to see where it will lead us. Who knows you may receive the SLAP!
There are a lot of things on my mind about this pregnancy and I was honestly becoming discouraged by the fact I have no definite answer. Do we ever have a definite answer? So, I thought if anyone can give me the answer it is God.
Well - Saturday night rolls around and I feel awful. Tired beyond belief, up every hour, can't get comfortable, heartburn, and just plain miserable. I woke up Sunday morning thinking forget it. I am not going to church. I wont get the answer I am longing for anyway. I won't get anything from service, and it was raining. I will stay home and rest.
Then a little nudge. I got dressed. Then Tim asks if I am going to church. Ironic. He knew nothing of my wanting to skip out. This is odd because he never asks me if I am going. So, I think okay sure I will go. By this time it is already 10am and I figure forget it. We will be late and I don't want to go.
Another nudge.
My friend Jordan sends me a text asking, "You going to be at church?" SLAP! Okay God you have my attention. I will be there. Late, tired, and all.
The moment I walk into the church I am overcome with happiness. Tired still, but happy. Once we sit down I think.. wow small crowd. Then I turn and see Braiden Fisher. I instantly become filled with joy at seeing him there. Then the church fills up. Brother after Brother stand. Testimonies, prayers, songs, prophecies, preachings.... every one seemed to hit home with me. I kept telling myself stay in your seat.
Then finally I decided to stand. I wanted to stand and say how Satan had almost won with me. I almost didn't come. Had it not been for the question and the text this morning. I would not have stood had it not been for two brethren standing to their feet to testify. I would not have stood but I did not want to fall short. I stood and shared how afraid I was that my daughter would not have the faith to fall back on, that I had been tormented following my baptism by Satan. I stood and shared everything I had felt that morning. Upon sitting I thought that sure was pointless.
Then Braiden began to sing. Wow... and then a sister stood to her feet to testify that all she wanted was to hear him sing. Then Braiden stood to say how he felt the spirit the moment he walked in to sing, but was fearful. Yet, had it not been for my standing to my feet he would not have done. That he was so thankful he did because that sister was in need and was able to have her prayer fulfilled.
I was overcome with joy.
Then here comes Sis. Odessa. She came and prayed for me. As soon as she got on her knee I was in tears. Her prayer was beautiful and filled with everything I had asked. The biggest thing I took from it was she prayed God would fill me with the type of faith my grandfather Jack had. I may not have known him, but wow his legacy holds strong. She then prayed God would guide us in the pregnancy and that my companion would be filled with faith during this time and would see by my example what the faith can do.
Again, I was overcome with joy.
So - although Satan may have almost won. God most certainly was triumphant in this battle. My heart and soul have been filled with peace, calm, and happiness since that morning. It has not ceased to thank him for the things he allowed me to see, hear, and witness.
My thought. If God puts it in your heart, even just a small grain, we should follow through. We should stand tall on what he has given us. We should grasp the moment and be patient to see where it will lead us. Who knows you may receive the SLAP!
Friday, July 5, 2013
Little Things
It keeps popping into my mind about how quickly life moves. There is no way to stop time from turning. We simply take each day as it is given and a lot of times we take them for granted.
This week has been an eye opener to me. One morning a man is healthy and ready to take on tomorrow. The next he is no longer in our lives. How quickly does life change... This pregnancy is yet another example of how quick life changes. Today we sit here looking on only 8 more weeks and our baby will arrive. Where have the last 7 months gone?
I truly wish there were a way to say HANG ON and time listen. But, that isn't so. Instead we need to use each moment to the fullest. We should take each minute and really look at the life we have.
How blessed am I to have a husband who supports me, friends who are there within a minute if I need them, a family who comes together just to be together, and a church family who is simply a call away if I ever need? Not everyone has those things, but everyone has something that is a blessing to them. Possibly their job, a child, a pet, etc. So, when I sit here and become sad about things I am going to think on those good things.
I will smile knowing God is looking down at me. I will smile knowing I have taken the time to follow through on his word. I will smile on all the moments in my life where I truly enjoyed what was taking place. I will laugh at the times where I sat staring at the clock wanting it to move faster.
What is it we are so eager to get to? I tell you this. I no longer will monitor the clock to simply pass the time. I will instead embrace the moments I have and hold them near to my heart.
I guess it is true. It's the little things in life.
This week has been an eye opener to me. One morning a man is healthy and ready to take on tomorrow. The next he is no longer in our lives. How quickly does life change... This pregnancy is yet another example of how quick life changes. Today we sit here looking on only 8 more weeks and our baby will arrive. Where have the last 7 months gone?
I truly wish there were a way to say HANG ON and time listen. But, that isn't so. Instead we need to use each moment to the fullest. We should take each minute and really look at the life we have.
How blessed am I to have a husband who supports me, friends who are there within a minute if I need them, a family who comes together just to be together, and a church family who is simply a call away if I ever need? Not everyone has those things, but everyone has something that is a blessing to them. Possibly their job, a child, a pet, etc. So, when I sit here and become sad about things I am going to think on those good things.
I will smile knowing God is looking down at me. I will smile knowing I have taken the time to follow through on his word. I will smile on all the moments in my life where I truly enjoyed what was taking place. I will laugh at the times where I sat staring at the clock wanting it to move faster.
What is it we are so eager to get to? I tell you this. I no longer will monitor the clock to simply pass the time. I will instead embrace the moments I have and hold them near to my heart.
I guess it is true. It's the little things in life.
Tuesday, July 2, 2013
A Man of Honor
Yesterday did not go as I had planned. That is the funny thing about God. He doesn't care what your plans are. He has his own.
I had all intentions of going to pick up a free rocker until I could get the one from my friends in Tahoka. That was until about 4:45... I received 2 phone calls from my friend and had to ignore them because of my work. I knew something wasn't right because rarely will she call so many times.
I sent a text saying I was sorry about not answering but what was up... her response, "My grandpa may be dying."
Those 5 words turned my world upside down.
I couldn't focus, I wanted to leave - running - out the door to get to him and to her. I waited patiently and at 5 I ran. Once I arrived I was greeted with an awake, drowsy, and weak grandpa. But he was alive and it was all I could focus on.
The ride to their house was so long. I was constantly reminded of church this Sunday. The power of healing. The power of prayer, the power of following God's word, the fact we all have a special gift in the faith and I kept praying God would grant me healing. At least for today.
As I sat with my friend I continued to think how thankful I was for her and her family, for her being there and not being on a deployment. I looked around the room at faces I have known my whole life and was overcome with joy. I looked into his face and saw that he knew who I was.
That sweet man who for so long was like a grandfather to me as well. No matter where he was he would make a point to say hello, he would make sure I felt welcomed, he was always so concerned with others and completely selfless.
Yes, there were times I thought, "Wow he sure can talk." But, I am so thankful I had those conversations with him. He was the perfect example of a man living solely by faith and was an example for me in how I want to lead my life.
Then this morning.
Another upside down. I get a phone and the first words I hear are... "Rina, my grandpa died." I froze. I simply couldn't come up with words to make sure she was okay. I couldn't think past the horror of how, why, when. The only words that would come were, "What?"
Today I am taking the time to truly appreciate the life we are given. I want to take the time to examine my life and how I lead it. I want to share with the world what he gave me even in his last moments.
Bro. Kenneth and Sis. Alma June are two of the best people. While there Sis. Alma June was so concerned with my getting the baby gift she and Bro. Kenneth had got for our little girl. I was speechless. How could they be so concerned with something so small when something so big was happening. As I left, she reminded me to take the gift. I smiled and told her I wouldn't leave without it.
On the way home I thought to myself how special these people were to me. How he looked so much better from the moment I had first arrived. I said one last prayer to God. I prayed that God's will be done and if it is to take him from this world that it happen quickly and peacefully.
I got home and opened this gift. It was pink (we all know I am not a huge fan of pink) but I didn't care. I looked at this elephant holding a blanket and thought Eddison will love this. I went to sleep with prayers in my mind for the whole family and a smile on my face. The smile because of all the memories I have.
So, upon the call this morning I was frozen. Yet, I was thankful God took him in his sleep with no struggle. God had heard and had delivered.
Later my friend told me that he had gained enough strength to talk, and had asked if I received that baby gift. I smiled and giggled at the thought. He was still concerned about my baby and her present and was completely unselfish in his ways. This is the man I knew and loved. That present of Eddison's will forever be a part of her life. I will share the story with her, and I will share all the memories of this man and his faith.
He is in Heaven looking down smiling. He is probably telling stories to anyone with an ear to hear. He is holding tight to those who left before him and waiting patiently to be reunited with those still on earth.
I know nothing can ease the pain of losing someone. However, I have full faith that one day, those holes will be filled with the good times, the stories, the preaching's, and the testimonies of a man who completely had the hearts of many. The tears that are falling from these cheeks will be happy tears, from memories shared.
I pray God sends comfort to Alma June, my dear friend, and the Herring family. I pray peace comes to them as they close their eyes. I pray he wraps his arms around them through this time.
RIP Bro. Kenneth Herring. We love you.
I had all intentions of going to pick up a free rocker until I could get the one from my friends in Tahoka. That was until about 4:45... I received 2 phone calls from my friend and had to ignore them because of my work. I knew something wasn't right because rarely will she call so many times.
I sent a text saying I was sorry about not answering but what was up... her response, "My grandpa may be dying."
Those 5 words turned my world upside down.
I couldn't focus, I wanted to leave - running - out the door to get to him and to her. I waited patiently and at 5 I ran. Once I arrived I was greeted with an awake, drowsy, and weak grandpa. But he was alive and it was all I could focus on.
The ride to their house was so long. I was constantly reminded of church this Sunday. The power of healing. The power of prayer, the power of following God's word, the fact we all have a special gift in the faith and I kept praying God would grant me healing. At least for today.
As I sat with my friend I continued to think how thankful I was for her and her family, for her being there and not being on a deployment. I looked around the room at faces I have known my whole life and was overcome with joy. I looked into his face and saw that he knew who I was.
That sweet man who for so long was like a grandfather to me as well. No matter where he was he would make a point to say hello, he would make sure I felt welcomed, he was always so concerned with others and completely selfless.
Yes, there were times I thought, "Wow he sure can talk." But, I am so thankful I had those conversations with him. He was the perfect example of a man living solely by faith and was an example for me in how I want to lead my life.
Then this morning.
Another upside down. I get a phone and the first words I hear are... "Rina, my grandpa died." I froze. I simply couldn't come up with words to make sure she was okay. I couldn't think past the horror of how, why, when. The only words that would come were, "What?"
Today I am taking the time to truly appreciate the life we are given. I want to take the time to examine my life and how I lead it. I want to share with the world what he gave me even in his last moments.
Bro. Kenneth and Sis. Alma June are two of the best people. While there Sis. Alma June was so concerned with my getting the baby gift she and Bro. Kenneth had got for our little girl. I was speechless. How could they be so concerned with something so small when something so big was happening. As I left, she reminded me to take the gift. I smiled and told her I wouldn't leave without it.
On the way home I thought to myself how special these people were to me. How he looked so much better from the moment I had first arrived. I said one last prayer to God. I prayed that God's will be done and if it is to take him from this world that it happen quickly and peacefully.
I got home and opened this gift. It was pink (we all know I am not a huge fan of pink) but I didn't care. I looked at this elephant holding a blanket and thought Eddison will love this. I went to sleep with prayers in my mind for the whole family and a smile on my face. The smile because of all the memories I have.
So, upon the call this morning I was frozen. Yet, I was thankful God took him in his sleep with no struggle. God had heard and had delivered.
Later my friend told me that he had gained enough strength to talk, and had asked if I received that baby gift. I smiled and giggled at the thought. He was still concerned about my baby and her present and was completely unselfish in his ways. This is the man I knew and loved. That present of Eddison's will forever be a part of her life. I will share the story with her, and I will share all the memories of this man and his faith.
He is in Heaven looking down smiling. He is probably telling stories to anyone with an ear to hear. He is holding tight to those who left before him and waiting patiently to be reunited with those still on earth.
I know nothing can ease the pain of losing someone. However, I have full faith that one day, those holes will be filled with the good times, the stories, the preaching's, and the testimonies of a man who completely had the hearts of many. The tears that are falling from these cheeks will be happy tears, from memories shared.
I pray God sends comfort to Alma June, my dear friend, and the Herring family. I pray peace comes to them as they close their eyes. I pray he wraps his arms around them through this time.
RIP Bro. Kenneth Herring. We love you.
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